I used to write the things I'd learned while studying my scriptures in a journal and I ran out of pages. I've used not having anywhere to write thoughts down as an excuse for not being as diligent in my study as I need to be for a few weeks, but then seeing Amberly's post regarding integrity helped give me the boost to recommit to being better at studying the gospel. Since I have no paper, I'll record my thoughts here.
Several years ago I heard a talk in sacrament meeting about asking if I was a Nephi or if I was a Sam. The gist of the talk (I might get it wrong since it was a long time ago, but what I remember it being) was that Sam was the elder brother, but since Nephi was the prophet it appears that Sam was not measuring up to his responsibilities and they therefore fell to his younger sibling. And the question was posed: are we living our lives as Sam, not equal to our potential, or are we striving to be like Nephi.
I have struggled with this concept. Mostly because I feel my own inadequacies cause me to fall in the category of a Sam. And feeling that Nephi-hood is a bit unattainable, and therefore I am falling far from perfection. But I don't want to be a Sam and not live the noteworthy life of a Nephi.
This morning I was reading in 1 Nephi 8:3 and Lehi says:
"And behold, because of the thing which I have seen, I have reason to rejoice in the Lord because of Nephi and also of SAM; for I have reason to suppose that they, and many of their seed, will be saved."
This statement coupled with the fact that God is no respecter of persons suddenly clicked together to liken themselves to my own life. I don't have to be a Nephi; being an Alicia is just fine. And if I find in Sam a kindred spirit, what's the harm in that? Sam partook of the fruit, just like Nephi, and remained faithful, even if he wasn't a leader. He was a disciple, and will be saved. I have partaken of the fruit and am working at remaining faithful. Heavenly Father doesn't expect me to be Nephi, or Sam for that matter.
The other thing that I learned today, might be of particular interest to my friend who told me yesterday that she was asked if Laman and Lemuel ever had a testimony. My gut reaction was yes they had, but they just didn't care enough to do what was right. But read here, friend, and you'll see that they never did.